I am reading "The Christian Atheist: Believing in God but Living As If He Doesn't Exist" by Craig Groeschel. A couple of months ago our pastor spoke on this topic and admitted to formally being a "christian atheist". I have cried through the entire book. I haven't yet finished it but I know I will be different at the end of it than when I started. I have been living as a Christian atheist. So many things have happened concerning my family this past year and at times I have wondered "why me" but I am now asking "why not me". There is so much I feel I deserve or God should grant me but when I look at what I actually deserve I have been given so much. I want to have joy in the pain and I am realizing that the pain is drawing me closer to the Lord and I do not wish any of it "Lost". I am thankful that God uses me when I am weak and broken. I pray that 2011 will be a year that I grow closer to my heavenly Father.
We are thankful for God's calling; to adopt. We are waiting for the home study process to start. God has continued to calm Rusty and I about the wait. We don't won't to rush the process or try to step ahead of God's will. I am thankful for His adoption of me and that has been a long process that will continue until I take my last breathe here on earth. In the meantime I am praying for our future children; after taking the adoption classes we realize that so many children are awaiting forever families. Our children will most likely have been physically, emotionally or sexually abused. I pray everyday for these children. It is my hope that through our process that more will be encourage to adopt.
Happy New Year!
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